Letter to the Editor: More than a day of remembrance

Military families do far more than stand behind service members; they shoulder the challenges of providing steady emotional support through active duty and the difficult shift back to civilian life. And when a service member dies, the burden doesn’t stop at the funeral, the flag-folding ceremony, or a day of national remembrance. For the family left behind, grief continues in everyday moments — raising children, managing responsibilities, and finding ways to honor the person they lost.

On September 27, the nation observes Gold Star Mothers and Families Day, honoring the mothers, fathers, spouses, and children who have lost a loved one in military service. Even if holding ceremonies and offering gratitude is a meaningful way of recognition, once the tributes end, a harder question remains: what happens to these families for the years and decades that follow?

In Lucas County, that question isn’t abstract. Nearly 19,500 veterans call the county home, and Toledo’s ties to military service run deep—from the 180th Fighter Wing at Toledo Express Airport to generations of northwest Ohio families who have sent a son, daughter, spouse, or parent into uniform. Nationally, the country is home to roughly 15.7 million veterans, and making sure their survivors are genuinely cared for should be part of how we honor them, not an afterthought.

Long before a loved one is lost, military families often carry a heavy, invisible burden, as many veterans develop illnesses tied to toxic exposures during service, including Agent Orange, asbestos, PFAS, VOCs, and other toxic substances the armed forces routinely used for decades. These conditions usually surface only years later, leaving spouses and parents to become caregivers, often stepping back from professional life to manage treatment and daily life. By the time a veteran’s condition proves fatal, many families have already spent years absorbing financial hardship.

Does the safety net actually hold?

When a veteran  passes, the families who have carried the weight of caregiving are left to confront the practical realities of lost income, mounting expenses, and long-term planning – on top pf their grief. Because of this, the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) established the Dependency and Indemnity Compensation (DIC) program to provide major relief.

As of December 1, 2025, spouses of service members who departed on or after January 1, 1993, may receive a tax-free monthly payment of $1,699.36. And such may also increase, particularly when the veteran was diagnosed with a disability before his death, the spouse also endures the same situation, and a minor child still lives in the same household. Yet while this measure is undeniably helpful, its effectiveness may still hinge on strict remarriage qualifications, which may limit the benefits available to deserving families. 

In addition, policymakers and veterans organizations have also observed how the program’s fixed structure could insufficiently reflect the veteran’s years of service and rank that once contributed significantly to the household’s stability. Unlike the retirement system operating for federal civilian employees, which calculates their tenure as a percentage of their earnings and allows dependents to receive as much as 55 percent of the retiree’s basic pension, military survivors often receive the same flat rate regardless of the veteran’s career. 

For a Toledo-area spouse who gave up a career to support a service member through deployments and, later, a terminal diagnosis, that gap is not a technicality. It’s the difference between rebuilding a stable life and simply getting by other forms of assistance—such as CHAMPVA’s healthcare coverage, education and career assistance, and Survivors’ Pension—also offer significant aid. But their strict eligibility requirements and coverage often prevent other families from getting the full support they need. 

A long overdue step forward, but more is needed

Lawmakers have already started making changes to improve DIC benefits. The Sharri Briley and Eric Edmundson Veterans Benefits Expansion Act passed the House in May 2026. It was sent  to the Senate Committee on Veterans’ Affairs in June. If enacted, it would add a supplementary amount on top of the standard cost-of-living adjustment. That’s a welcome step, but it still leaves the basic structure unchanged: a flat benefit that doesn’t reflect what any individual family actually lost. For those who have already devoted much time, income, and personal well-being to care for a veteran, these concerns can compound the hardship instead of easing it. Resolving this is not merely a policy adjustment—it is a moral imperative. 

Gold Star Mothers and Family Day gives Toledo a moment to say thank you. But real support for military families can’t cease with a ceremony. It means backing efforts to modernize DIC so it reflects a veteran’s service and a family’s real financial circumstances, and it means Toledo-area residents supporting the local organizations that walk alongside these families the other 364 days of the year. Our military families’ responsibilities don’t end when a service member is gone, and neither should ours.