This week has been filled with a lot of emotion, and I really appreciate all the messages I’ve gotten from former listeners of my show. One in particular stood out to me and it reminded me how I could turn this bad luck into a lesson for my kids.
I was getting out of my 3-year-olds bed after she finally fell asleep for the night, when my phone notified me of a Facebook message. It was from a former listener named Angi. After she stated her displeasure for my departure, she offered me a job. Not a job in radio, but a job as a loan officer. Through listening to the show, Angi knew that I had no experience or desire to work in that field, but as someone that cared about my well-being, she wanted to extend the offer just in case I was in need.
I was very moved by the offer, and even though it was awesome, I had to decline her offer; and here’s why.
When I was growing up, I would get home from school and my mother would be there, usually getting ready to leave for work as a waitress. She always had a look of disappointment on her face, and quite often would throw out comments like, “I have to go into that rat hole again.” I remember quite vividly how badly my mother hated her job.
I remember asking her why she didn’t do something else and she always told me that it was because she didn’t do well in school, and she wasn’t that smart. Those excuses didn’t last too long, because I soon found out that my mother was too afraid to fail at whatever she would try, so she wouldn’t try anything new. She left me with the horrible message, “You can’t fail at something if you never try.” How sad.
It was right around that time that I put all of this together in a promise I made to myself. I promised that I would find whatever passions I had in my life and pursue those as my career. I figured that if I did something that moved me, I would never really go to “work.” We’ve all heard the old saying, “do something you love for a living and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Well, that was my plan.
I knew that I loved planes and anything that had anything to do with them so I put that on my list. I also loved sports, and loved anything that had to do with music production.
To make a very long story short, my enlistment in the Navy to become a pilot and my career as a professional beach volleyball player were both cut short because of injuries. Again I looked to my list and found music.
I entered college (again) for music production. I wanted to remix and arrange music. In the process of doing that I found radio, and it matched my personality so well I fell in love. Being a radio host was now the new thing I wanted to do…and it only took three other careers before I found the one I would settle on. Are you reading mom?
Radio is something that you have to love in order to do it. Every time I would get new interns I would tell them that they should only do this if they love it. The industry is so hurtful that if you don’t have a thick skin and a passion for it, it will spit you out and laugh as it’s happening.
Just under two-weeks ago I was hurt by the industry again, and this time it hurt my family pretty badly. I moved my family to a new city, fought to make my way onto a show that was as dysfunctional and emotionally rocked as it possibly could be and earned my spot. I was promised longevity and had it torn up in my face, only to be left jobless. Wow…I should run. But I won’t.
I love this industry, and unless I find the industry doesn’t want me, I’ll continue to love it. I love getting messages from people I don’t even know, but they feel like they know me. They care so much about me and my family that they want to offer me a career job, and we’ve never even met. Even though that is awesome, it’s only obvious when something really bad happens; and that’s okay.
I would rather go through what I’m going through right now than live the life my mother lived. I am not afraid to fail. I am not afraid to try new things that could lead to my failing, either. I would much rather chase what I love and fail than live a life filled with misery. That is a lesson I really believe my children need to learn by example.
I also want to make it clear that if radio turns out to be something I can’t do anymore because there’s an issue providing for my family, then it is I that will end the relationship. Nothing is more important than your family, and you always do what you have to for them. If I have to leave radio behind, then I’ll have to teach my kids the lesson about how you always have a backup plan in case your first one fails.
